P Diddy

If he ever formed part of Ken Dodd’s boyband, this particular Diddy man didn’t register. But as a global megastar, P, Puffy, Daddy, Diddums or whatever his current handle may be, is nothing less than an inspiration to mankind. Faced with a morning wardrobe crisis, the gospel according to Sean John comforts and guides us: ‘I feel safe in white, because deep down inside, I’m an angel’. As mere mortals, we can but strive to follow his example. Gracing a London fleshpot with his presence and £500,000 to blow - nothing so base as a forthcoming CD to promote - it’s said he was followed wherever he went by a heaven scent perfume skoosher - eau de Diddy to promote? - drank only his own creation, Ciroc -  he can even turn water into vodka? - and was attended throughout by a personal hairdresser, magician and a human coathanger lest his sheepskin coat weigh heavy like a cross on the Diddy shoulders. Lordy!